happy mother’s day

I was in a line at the supermarket the other day, and I had all my things on the little conveyor belt there. There’s a gal in front of me that is staring at me and I’m getting a little nervous and she continues to stare at me. And I keep looking the other way. And then, finally she comes over closer to me and she says: “I apologize for staring, that must have been annoying. I, I…you look so much like my son, who died. I just can’t take my eyes off you.” And she precedes to go into her purse and she pulls out a photograph of her son who’d died. And he looks absolutely nothing like me. In fact, he’s Chinese. Anyway, we chatted a little bit. And she says: “I’m sorry, I have to ask you. Would you mind, as I leave the supermarket here, would you mind saying “Goodbye mom” to me? I, I know it’s a strange request but I haven’t heard my son say, “Goodbye mom” to me in so long, and it would mean so much to me to hear it.” And I said: “Well, you know, okay, yeah, sure… I can say that.” And so, she gets her groceries all checked out, and as she’s going out the door she waves at me and she hollers across the store: “Goodbye son!” And I look up and I wave and I say: “Goodbye mom!” And then she goes.

So I get my few things there, on the conveyor belt and the checker checks out my things. He gives me the total and he says: “That’ll be four hundred and seventy nine dollars.” And I said: “Well, how is that possible!?! I’ve only got a little tuna fish, and some skimmed milk, and mustard and a loaf of bread.” He goes: “Well, you’re also paying for the groceries for your mother. She told me you’d take care of the bill for her.” And I said: “Well, wait a minute! That’s not my mother!” And he says: “Well I distinctly heard her say as she left the store, ‘Bye son!’ and you said ‘Bye mom!’ and so what are you trying to say here?” I said: “Well, JESUS!” And I looked out into the parking lot and she was just getting into her car. And I ran out there. And she was just closing the door, and she had a little bit of her leg sticking out of the door and she was pulling away and I grabbed her leg and I started pulling it…

Just like the way I’m pulling yours.

-Tom Waits, “Missing My Son,” from ORPHANS - Brawlers, Bawlers and Bastards